I asked him to leave last November - I stopped lying to myself; stopped hoping, praying, wishing, pushing to make it work. I surrendered and let go, consciously moved away from the dream I had for us; I am moving toward something I want to feel more. I let go with generosity and compassion, giving him until the end of the school year to move out, in order to make it an easier transition for him and our children.
The other morning, just two days after being told how hard I am to love, I received the below private message on fb. Just about every year, around this time, I receive a similar sweet note. I had an interesting emotional response; I sat down and wept. We had a tender, secret romance, we were never lovers, not so much as a kiss. Our lips brushed once. I was 14.
I am reminded of how easy I am to love; you, ex-guy, just really suck at it.
Five of my favorite things: 1: beautiful aesthetic – think Italian linen, French laundry tables, three dozen sunset shades of peonies. . . / 2: the smell of my children’s heads / 3: gastronomy – the art of badass food / 4: earl grey tea with milk and honey / 5 : the Mediterranean Sea